April Blog

Huh, late with the Blog again. And what’s the excuse this time I hear all three of you sigh. Well, this one’s rock-solid. I’ve got something called stenosis of the spine, whereby vertebrae very slowly become mis-aligned until they start pressing on nerves. And it really hurts. Swearing helps, as does shuffling about the place, and I’ve got some Cloud 9 painkillers which allow you to watch daytime telly without sneering or eating bits of carpet.

So a spine operation’s in the offing soon. My brother had the same operation years ago – very successfully. Actually, medics don’t say “operation”. They say “procedure”. Because its cooler, probably.

In the meantime, a very young airline pilot showed us what can happen when the human mind comes to pieces The word “unbelievable” fits the bill.

And in Leicester, thousands of people queued round the block to file past a big lump of Yorkshire stone under which lie the earthly remains of Richard III. ”An explanation, an explanation – my Kingdom for an explanation !” I really don’t understand it. Mind you, Richard had a naff spine too. So he can’t have been all bad.

The election is upon us. I’m a political simpleton. I think its wrong that a country should be governed by [mainly] men who all went to the same posh schools and colleges – and who just all happen to be independently wealthy. Of course they’ll want a Tory victory. Looking after their own. Me, I’ll be voting for the much maligned Ed. Miliband. Just because he copped for a disobedient bacon sandwich doesn’t mean that he doesn’t understand the plight of the worse off, or what “average” means.

But the thing which is really irritating me is McToad of Toad Hall’s popping up again – aiming at bringing Scots influence to bear in Westminster. Do English MPs vote in the Scots or Welsh parliaments ? No. Ergo……..

Time to do the gag of the month………………………..

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